Leaders need trust from their teams to accomplish big, strategic goals that are high risk. As we’ve discovered, leaders cannot demand teams trust them. In fact, demands will backfire and erode trust fast! Rather, an effective and purpose-filled leader will ask, “How can I demonstrate trust within my team?” Top leaders recognize the ripple effect of their behavior in an organization.
Reliability and authenticity both have tremendous ripple effects in building trust. We previously described reliability as consistently doing what you say you’re going to do. Authenticity is an internal guidance system that people around you observe as consistent behaviors and speech regardless of the situation or environment. Authenticity is related to the emotional intelligence (EQ) category of self-management.
Authentic leaders build trust by responding to crises in a deliberate manner. No temper tantrums or throwing blame and shame at others. Leaders take responsibility for their actions and decisions that lead to outcomes, favorable or not. Authentic leaders are the same people at work, at home, at church, at the supermarket, and on the highway driving in their car.
Human beings – even small children – have built in radar that detects authenticity. We don’t always act on discrepancies we observe, but we always reduce our trust in that person a little bit. The red flag for a relationship breaking down in trust may rise just as a small question of honesty or authenticity. Yet continued patterns of deceit or lies will hamper respect and trust.
Back in the day when phones were mounted to a wall in the kitchen, I started asking “why” questions about authenticity. My mother always answered the phone in a syrupy sweet voice. Her “hello” dripped like maple syrup on a stack of hot pancakes. But within mere seconds, I knew who was on the other end of the line.
More sugar and syrup meant it was a doctor or a member of her family. A monotone, gravelly, and harsh response meant it was my dad – working to build his business – would be late for dinner. When she angrily banged the handset against the receiver on the wall, it meant the person on the other end was a telemarketer.
Inconsistent and varied behaviors (like radical changes in the tone of voice) signal inauthenticity. Verbal intonations, hand gestures, and angry outbursts are signs that we don’t want to trust that person. Red flags flying in the face of building trust. We expect people to be the same – with honesty and integrity – whether we see them at the office, at a ball game, or at the supermarket. Our clothes might change, but authentic and trustworthy leaders behave in a consistent, just, and righteous way all the time!
Take a look at your interactions with people in your life in different situations. Are you the same person in all situations? Do you thank the janitor for his work to the same degree you thank your boss for your promotion? Does your speech remain consistent regardless of who you’re talking to?
